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The word “spiritual” has no useful meaning if it does not refer to a relation to a real spirit, something from a world not our own, something supernatural, something that or someone who tells us things we do not know, judges us for our failures, and gives us ideals to strive for and maybe help in reaching them. It’s not like “religion.” That’s a cold and forbidding word. Drugs and drink are bad for you, and wealth and sex are hard to get, and achievement takes work. His sense of evil is diluted or lacking altogether, and so he has forgotten the price of restoration.” “At its worst,” O’Connor concluded, ours is “an age that has domesticated despair and learned to live with it happily.” Very often, I think, the distinction of “spiritual” from “religious” with the first emptied of meaning is the ideology, the justification, of domesticated despair.

It’s not a useful word if it means a general inclination or shape of mind or emotional pattern or set of attitudes or collection of values. Unless, of course, you like that little sense of importance and that comforting sense of social approval that our society still gives to “spiritual things,” though not to religious things. “We live in an unbelieving age but one which is markedly and lopsidedly spiritual,” observed the Catholic writer Flannery O’Connor. It is a way of feeling better about being alone in the universe by claiming some relation with something beyond us, though we know not what.

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It’s the religious equivalent of “I gave at the office” or “There’s a call on the other line” or “I don’t eat meat.” So we find Lady Gaga, the pornographic songstress, telling a reporter for that she has a new spirituality just before taking her out for a night at a Berlin sex club. To be truly spiritual—on a scale on which “the Catholic God” seems stuck in the middle—apparently means indifferently inclusive or (what is another way of saying the same thing) undogmatic. Gaga or anyone else who talks like this has really thought it through. A few years ago a much-reported study of college students’ religious practice found that they become more “spiritual” as their observance of their childhood faith declined. You have to ask what the spirit wants and what he requires and what he says. an idyll rather than a drama, with a happy ending instead of that gaunt Cross rising so inexorably into the sky.” The spirit might turn out to be a Puritan. Better to be “spiritual” without the spirit, and hope no one notices. “Spiritual but not religious” provides a comfortable compromise between the two sides of our natures, our desire for God and our desire to be God ourselves.

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